The Vizard and the Promise
by LIFE-Anime-DEATH
Summary: Kurenai Urahara, adopted sister of Kisuke Urahara, many years ago abandoned by her friends and family, she starts off on her own little advanenture. Takes place after the turn back the pendulum arc A Shinji H. X OC story.
1. Chapter 1

~The Vizard and the Promise~

**Theme song: I don't care By: Apocalyptica **

****

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As I walked through division's barracks I remembered the dream I had last night…it was about Shinji and the others…I wanted to find out more about the past…about…_that_ night…

**You should stop dwelling on the past** Kurai's voice told me.

_**Insensitive fool!**_Awai said, _**She loved the boy.**_

_I DID NOT LOVE HIM!_ I mentally shouted at her.

**Su~re that's why you still have dreams about him and whisper his name in your sleep! **Kurai taunted.

"I do that?" I asked them skeptically, biting my lip.

_**Yep!**_ Awai said. I moaned, _A distraction…that's what I need…_I told them.

**Fighting! It always helps… **Awai protested.

_**That's all you ever want to do! **_Kurai made a humph sound.

**The only reason you don't like it is because you **_**can't**_** fight!**

Kawai taunted mentally sticking his tongue out at Awai.

_**I've saved more lives then you could ever protect in a millennium!**_Awai shouted.

**Oh really?! What about that boy in-?! **Kawai said I had no clue what he was talking about but apparently Awai remembered something as she flinched.

_**THAT! Was a mistake…**_

_OH! WILL YOU TWO STOP ARGUING FOR ONE! MINUTE!_ I shouted at both of them as I continued my paper work, when a small white haired boy came in and said, "Captain Urahara, Matsumoto's out cold again…" I sighed.

"Toshiro! How many time's do I have to tell you! Call me Kurenai! And as for Matsumoto…well …" I thought for a minute and said, "Leave her…" Toshiro sighed and started on his paper work.

**You know…that white haired kid wouldn't be too bad…** Kawai said.

_What in the world do you mean?_ I asked him mentally.

_**He means that you and him make a cute couple…**_

_THE HELL-!? What is it with you two and your fixation on my love life?! _I shouted at them.

**So you admit you have a love life! **Kawai shouted almost victoriously.

_**Let's see…first it was Kaien, he's out of the picture, then it was Shinji…he's still a possibility-!**_

"NO! JUST STOP! NO!" I shouted, this time I accidentally did it aloud…

"Huh?" Toshiro asked looking up a bit confused, _THAT'S IT!_

"I'm sorry Toshiro!" I said as I grabbed my Zanpaku-to's and through them out the office window…

"Huh?" Toshiro asked again.

"I've had it with them!" I muttered and sat back on my desk finishing my paper work, I'd go fetch them later…after all I had sparing practice with Kenpachi later…the door suddenly burst open with a drunk Matsumoto…

"MATSUMOTO!" Toshiro yelled.

I rolled my eyes as I said, "Hey! I hear Ikkaku think's he can beat you in a drinking contest!" I told her as her eyes widened she stumbled out of the room looking for Ikkaku…

"I don't see why you put up with her Captain…" Toshiro said, when I didn't respond he sighed and said, "Kurenai…"

I smiled and said, "It's true she's lazy and a bit…well…yeah…but she's reliable and strong willed at the same time…" I told him, I saw him grudgingly smile he usually wasn't one to smile in public I felt a sense of accomplishment the first time I made him smile, "You can leave we'll finish this tomorrow…" I suggested.

As he said, "We really should get this work done…" that was another difference between him and Hiyori she wasn't one for work but he was always concentrated on his work…thinking about a normal boy around his age it made me laugh…

"Your choice," I said, as I grabbed my Zanpaku-to's they immediately started in: **GHA! You think you can just through us out the window like some dogs?!**

_Yep! _I said.

_**Your heartless Kurenai! Truly heartless!**_

I sighed, _maybe you two just need to learn to keep out of other peoples PERSONAL dilemmas_

**So you admit there dilemmas…** Kurai said pushing me again

_***Sigh* Your feelings are our feelings, your dilemmas are our dilemmas!**_

_Just leave it…_I said to them, it was spring and everything was covered in flower petals…as I walked pass sixth division I had an idea I found a pinecone and threw it at the back of a red headed idiot.

"Kurenai!" his outraged voice yelled.

"It's Captain Urahara to you!" I corrected as he struggled to refrain his anger, I saw this and laughed. "How 'bout a little bet?" I said as he smirked.

"Why not?" I met his smirk and said, "We'll fight, if I win you have to be my dog for a month! Come when I call you, bark when I tell you to bark and call me master…if you win…you can call me what ever you want…"

He smiled and agreed.

_**This is reckless Kurenai!**_ Awai said.

_Well I need a distraction!_

**And fighting it out is the best way!** Kurai backed me up.

Awai sighed as I yelled, "Ookami-no-sono-kurai Higyou-no-ato-tsuki-zetsumei!" I said as my staff turned into a black dagger, he released his Zanpaku-to as well as we fought, I sent one of my black moon crescents towards him as he blocked it with his zanpaku-to but wasn't able to hold it back forever he jumped up and pushed it down I created another one as they encircled him causing a tornado of black fire.

"ZABIMARU!" he shouted as the sword extended into a whip it lunged for me as I blocked it with my white staff.

"Your weak cherry top!" {Cherry top, a nickname for Renji referring to his red hair}

"DON'T CALL ME THAT! AND I'M NOT WEAK!" he said as he charged again I sliced his arm with one of the crescents he barely dodged the other one.

"Pathetic…you shouldn't be so easily outrage Akapine…" {Red pine, pineapple} the black crescents pined him to the ground as I walked over his red hair, "Well?" I taunted, he glared at me…

"I surrender _master_…" he spat the last word that was amusing but I wanted more…I needed someone stronger…

"Hey! Cherry top! Any idea where Ikkaku is?" I found Ikkaku and fought him for a bit then got annoyed at his lack of skill and decided just to finish it…later I fought Kenpachi…he was a lot more fun but half way through the Head Captain came and told us we had to stop due to the damage…damned old man…

**Maybe-!** Kurai started.

_**MAYBE! You should just shut up! **_Awai finished.

**Don't tell me what to do old woman!** Kurai retorted.

_**We're twins you idiot!**_ Awai exclaimed.

_PLEASE! JUST SHUT UP!_ I shouted exasperated. As I lay in bed, I dreamed of _that _night…


	2. Chapter 2

**Theme song: Truth By: Seether**

"_It'll be alright, don't move," said a voice. I knew that voice, I knew it but why, why can't I remember… I thought. I opened my eyes, a little, everything hurt, and my vision was extremely blurred. I could see a face not far from mine, but I couldn't seem to focus on it. I could, however, see the dark red stains on his face and in his back length yellow, blonde hair. Oh, god, what-did-I-do? What the hell happened? I thought._

"_W-w-what…What did I…" I tried to speak but it was hard, I coughed a little and could feel as blood began to seep out of the corner of my mouth and down my face. A finger was placed over my lips._

"_Hush, now will ya love, don't worry." The blonde whispered to me, as he wiped at my cheek, to remove the silent tears, I didn't realize I was shedding. It was blurry but I could see that damn grin on his face to reassure me everything was fine…Then his hand appeared in front of my face, there was a quick blue light, then darkness…_

_The next thing I know I'm in twelfth division's main research lab, Tessai the lieutenant of the Kido corps at the time, and Kisuke were both rushing around the lab doing stuff that I couldn't really understand, I tried to sit up, "K-Kisuke?" I managed to say his eyes widened as he rushed over and told me to lay down I looked around and saw Shinji, Hiyori, the captains and lieutenants of other divisions…all of them had hollow masks on…I tried to get up as I was looking into a large glass tube I saw my own reflection…but I wasn't sure it was me…my face too was covered in a hollow mask…suddenly everything turned into a red haze I felt myself lash out at everything…then…darkness…_

**WAKE UP! WAKE UP!** Kurai's voice was suddenly in my head.

_W-What?!_ I mentally screamed, I was sweating heavily.

_**You were dreaming of that again weren't you?**_ the soothing voice of Awai calmed me…I sighed as I though, whatever happened must have been bad. Otherwise he wouldn't have erased my memories of the events. You fool. You left after you knocked me out. I'm guessing the coma wasn't exactly expected though, but still…You baka! Why the hell did you leave?! And just where the hell did you go? I'm sure that my dear 'brother' has an idea, but that fool got himself exiled, probably more out of fear of what I'd do to him when I woke up then anything else I sighed and slowly got up…I thought of him…at the same time I hated them all…for leaving. Me. For leaving _me_…but when I find Shinji and my damned brother there would be hell to pay…I wanted to know…I needed to know…just what happened that night? Why was I left behind? What were those masks?

_Awai…Kurai? Are you guys still awake?_ I asked.

**Yes…we're still here…** they said in unison.

_Do you guys know? Do you know what happened that night?_ I asked them they both hesitated.

_**Well…**_ Awai began when Kurai interrupted, **All we can say is stay away from Aizen…**

_HOW DOES THAT HELP!? You guys know something…_ I accused, nothing…geez…some help they were…fine…if they wanted me to stay away from Aizen…I'd just have to get closer to him…

The next day I left them in my room and went to fifth division, "Hey Hinamori, Aizen here?" I asked.

She smiled and said, "Yep! He's in his office…" I thanked her and went in.

"Hello, Captain Urahara what can I do for you today?" he asked his usual polite self.

"I don't know…recently I've just found myself thinking of that night I went into a coma…I just felt like you might understand…after all Shinji was your captain…then he goes missing…" I began.

I thought I saw his smile falter as he said, "Yes…it was quite a loss…you must feel devastated…I'm sorry to say there's not much comfort that I can provide I wasn't there…" he put down his writing pen, "Hinamori!" he called as she came in, "Why don't all three of us go out to eat?"

Momo beamed as I said, "Thank you…but I've got some work I have to attend to, thank you for your time…" I departed as I got back to my room I heard some familiar voices…I listened at the door…

_**We can't tell her!**_Awai's voice said.

**I know… **Kurai's voice said.

_**Then what **__**are**__** we going to do?**_Awai pushed.

**We can't tell her the truth, for now all we can do is hide it…** Kurai said his voice held a determined edge to it, now I was absolutely positive they knew something…

_**She's becoming impatient…I'm worried she's going to…**_ Awai said, going to what?

**I know, she'll find out sooner or later, lets just hope it's later…****it's**** growing impatient as well…** Kurai said. What's growing impatient? They began arguing about which one of them I liked best and once it became clear they weren't going to say anything more I went in, they stood in wolf form, both crouched ready to attack each other.

I walked in and asked, "What are you two fighting about now!?"

Kurai slumped over and said, **Please tell her that I'm your favorite and always have been!**

Awai growled and said, _**Please tell him, he's being an idiot and I'm your favorite!**_

I rolled my eyes as I said, "Common, lets go out…you can stay in wolf form…" they followed me constantly growling at each other as we walked through tenth division's halls people backed away.

**There afraid of us…** Kurai said.

_**Well…it's not everyday you get to see two wolves…**_ Awai said calmly she shrunk into a puppy size and hopped on my back as people crowded around her, "OMG! She's so cute!" they squealed as Kurai groaned, I chuckled.

_**Face it I'll always be the cute one!**_ Awai taunted growling a puppy growl more people crowded around.

Kurai had a smug look as he said, **Yep, always the suck up, always the needy, always the cute one, and I'll always be the stronger more hansom older brother! **I laughed a bit.

_**Watch it! Your only two minutes earlier and yesterday it was **__**you**__** calling **__**me**__** an old lady!**_ we got outside as I leaned up against a Japanese maple and started singing as Awai curled up into a ball in my lap, Kurai leaned his head against my shoulder…


	3. Chapter 3

**Theme song: Colours of the rainbow By: Tune up**

So then show

You wanna look kind

24/7 on my mind

All I ever wanted

Is to be with you

Make me feel

Is so brand new

I thought I could love no more

Warned to many times before

Now every time I look into the sky

I've got you on my mind

The colors of the rainbow shine so bright

Every time I look into your eyes

It's the colors of the rainbow that feed my soul

Over and over just like you do

The colors of the rainbow shine so bright

Every time I look into your eyes

It's the colors of the rainbow that feed my soul

Over and over just like you do

Kurai and Awai had fallen asleep by now as a I heard a familiar voice, "Captain…" I turned.

"Kurenai! And hello Toshiro…" he sat down next to me and started stroking Kurai, Kurai let out a small growl, as Toshiro pulled back his hand, "Don't worry…I'd say he won't bite but knowing him he might…"

Toshiro smirked, as he said, "Your really good a singing…" I swore I was blushing as I looked away hiding it.

"You heard?" I asked with a slight whine to my voice.

"Yep…" he said.

"Geez…I really need to make sure I'm alone before I start singing…" I muttered.

"That's stupid…why hide something your so good at?" he said, I felt a vibration from Awai and could tell she was laughing…

"Because it's embarrassing…" I said leaning back up against the tree…

"You're a girl right?" he asked, as I made a pft sound.

"Um…that's what they told me…"

He then looked to the ground and said, "What should I do if I really liked a girl…a lot, but don't know how to tell her?" I felt my self mentally laugh…Shiro-chan's asking me for girl help?

"Well…you should probably just tell her that you like her and ask her if she'd like to go out to dinner sometime…" I told him honestly.

As he said, "Well…Kurenai…I-I really sort of like you…and…would you like to go out some time?" my jaw dropped open, OMG! Did he just?

**BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA! **Kurai's booming laughter erupted.

"I-I-I-I," I stuttered my heart beat fast, as I felt my self lean over and kiss him, I jolted back, "I-I-I-I'm sorry…" I jumped up and ran back to my room.

_**You can't just leave him there! **_Awai said.

As I shouted, _WERE YOU TWO LISTENING THE ENTIRE TIME?! _Oh my god!

**Well what are you going to do?** Kurai asked me.

_I didn't know he ment me! _I mentally shouted at them.

_**Who else?**_ Awai questioned.

_I-I-I-I thought he ment Momo or something! _I shouted.

**Then why'd you kiss him?** Kurai asked, as I groaned and plopped on my bed. I got up again and began pacing the room thinking about what in the world just happened.

**HAHAHAHA!** Kurai's laughter continued, did I think of him as more then a brother?! No! That wasn't possible…it couldn't be…he's like 50 years younger then me!

_**Ah…**_ sighed Awai, _**Forbidden love how romantic…**_

_Being fifty years younger doesn't make it forbidden it makes it wrong!_ I shouted not pausing my pacing.

**You can't stop love no matter how wrong it is!** Kurai said.

_**Finally stopped laughing have you?**_ Awai commented as my face turned red.

_I DO NOT LOVE HIM! _I yelled.

They both sighed as they said at the same time, _**That's exactly what you said about Shinji…**_

I threw a pillow at the wall as I yelled, "OF COURSE YOU HAVE TO BRING _**HIM**_ INTO THIS! HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO SAY THIS! HIRAKO MEANS NOTHING! HE WAS JUST A POINTLESS WASTE OF TIME! A REGRET!" I wanted to burst into tears but I held them back. As I grabbed a pillow and flopped it over my head, I hate you Shinji…


	4. Chapter 4

**Theme song: Sooner or later By: Breaking Benjamin **

I hate you Shinji…I hate your stupid yellow piss pee hair…I hate that damned sparkling smile…I hate your shifty grey eyes…I hate the way…I can't hate you entirely…

_He left me…I'm not going to be hurt again…_ I told them calmly.

**Is that why you ran away?** Kurai asked, I felt my head nod.

_**You should at least apologize to that Toshiro boy…**_ Awai told me, I hated it when she was right…

I found Toshiro at fifth division talking with Momo, "Then she just ran away…" he said, his voice sounded hurt as I was filled with guilt.

"T-T-Toshiro!" Momo shouted, "I don't care about her! I just care about you! Why can't you see that!? Why do you only care about her?!" what?! This surprised me more then anything…

"I-I-I'm sorry Momo…I love you…but not like that…your like a sister to me…I love Kurenai…" he said the guilt and honestly in his voice was firm, "I-I-I DON'T CARE ANYMORE!" She shouted as I hid she ran out her face was all twisted up full of pain it hurt to look at it…is that what Toshiro looked like when I ran away? Toshiro let out a sigh as I approached him.

"Hey…" I said I didn't know what to say all of the sudden my heart sped up and I found my self stumbling over my words, "I- Well, um, I just, you see, I kind of, well," I sighed…this was all _they're_ fault… "I jut wanted to…apologize…" I said sheepishly he smiled as I my heart felt like it was going to burst out of my chest…

"I-I-I don't know what's going on right now…" I muttered…he laughed it was surprisingly filled with happiness, it fit him…usually he's always glum and serious looking…when he laughed it made him seem more like a boy…

"Don't worry bout it…I'll wait…" he said…waiting…maybe that's what I should've done…wait…what is Toshiro to me? Was he just a substitute for the pain? I didn't want to think of him as that it seemed a bit…well, selfish…using him for my own personal pain reliever…

"Well Kurenai, later…" he said as he left I realized he called me Kurenai!

"**It's growing restless again," **

"**Can you hold it back?"**

"**I'm trying!" **

"**Sooner or-" **

"**I KNOW!" **

"**Should we tell her the truth?" **

"**NO! Not yet…she's not ready…" **

"**I don't think she'll ever be ready but she needs to know…" **

"**The truth's going to hurt, but she'll have to learn to accept it," **

"**What she does after she learns the truth is entirely up to her…but I'm worried what she'll do…" **

"**Well we've got to confront her…" **

"**Lets just let her have a little bit more time with her new pain reliever as she put it…" **

"**A rather odd way to put it if I do say so myself," **

"**pft, yeah…"**

The next day I fought back a smile as Toshiro came into the office the next day, "Good morning Captain," he said, back to his usual self eh? Today he came in carrying a box of chocolate and other sweets.

"Who's that from?" I asked not looking up from my paper work.

"Captain Ukitake…I wish he'd stop treating me like a kid!" he said with a venting edge to his voice.

"No offence…but you _are_ a kid…" I said mater of factually.

He made a humph sound and said, "Well! I do look like a kid but I'm actually ninety years old!" he protested, this shocked even me! Of course I was still a lot older but he only looked twelve!

"Well it's true that soul's age a lot slower then humans…" I said mostly to myself as a hell butterfly flew in and landed on my finger.

*ALL CAPTAINS AND LIEUTENANTS PLEASE REPORT TO FIRST DIVISION HEAD QUARTERS IMMEDIATELY!*

"Did you get that?" I asked Toshiro he nodded his face was back to its original determined look, I was about to grab my Zanpaku-to when I realized…they weren't there…oh well I didn't have time to search and if a battle came up I could just use Kido. I flash stepped to first division Toshiro followed close behind, I was the fifth captain there…the head captain, Soi Fon, Unohana, Aizen and there Lieutenants were all there as we walked in I saw Momo give Toshiro a dirty look, Toshiro just sighed, every captain was there except third divisions captain Ichimaru, he was thirty minutes late…once all the captains were there the head captain began.

"I know this is sudden but an I have good reason for calling this emergency captains meeting! Exactly one hour ago all shinigami patrolling the perimeters of the Rukongai were all reported dead," gasps of surprise erupted.

"The purpose of these sudden deaths are unknown but we request all shinigami have there zanpaku-to's at all times! We need two captains to volunteer to look into this along with Captain of second division Soi Fon," he waited for one second as I stepped forward at the same time as, to my surprise Aizen, he rarely volunteered for this type of stuff…

"Very well! Captain Kurotsuchi has the information you'll need report to his division in exactly one hour!" I wondered if that'd be enough time to _find_ my zanpaku-to…

_Awai! Kurai! Are you guys there?_ I asked, I felt insane talking to myself inside my head.

**Yes, but we're a bit busy!** Kurai said, what could they be busy with?

_Mind telling me where you are?_

_**Do you need us right now?**_ Awai asked, I told them about the Captains meeting as I walked back to my room I found them there.

_Any clue why Aizen would volunteer for this?_ I asked them.

**I don't know but be careful of him. **Kurai warned again, I sighed.

_Yeah, yeah, _I responded lazily.

_**This is no joke! Take this seriously!**_ Awai commanded, it was unusual for her to protest on something that trivial… was it just me or is everyone acting crazy today?! I was about to knock at Aizen's office door when I heard Gin and Tosen all there talking…those three never converse! I knocked as they paused.

"Oh! 'Ello captain Urahara!" Gin greeted me with that huge grin…it reminded me a bit of Shinji…GHA! NO! I refuse to even think that name! I told myself as Tosen turned to nodded to me I took that as a hello, I noticed Gin had his sword out and it was soaked in blood he followed by eyes and quickly sheathed it and smiled again, Gin and Tosen left as Aizen greeted me as politely as ever…I also noticed there was a blood stain on the carpet.

"U-Um Captain Aizen…" I said a bit unsure, _Any idea why Aizen is suddenly having in-depth conversations with Gin and Tosen?_ I asked them curious.

**Well Gin used to be Aizen's lieutenant…**Kurai said, his voice trailed off as if he knew more but was unwilling to say, as I realized it had been one hour!

"Well we should probably get to twelfth division!" he said standing up…


	5. Chapter 5

**Theme song: Lose yourself By: Eminem**

All the shinigami were killed the exact same way…by a hollow except for the southern perimeter guard…_he_ apparently died by sword… "Is there any other information?" I asked.

Soi Fon came in and said, "I just sent half the mobile corps out after the report of the dead shinigami and they all died, apparently this time by sword…we suspect rouge shinigami but that doesn't explain the hollow-"

I thought I saw Aizen's mouth twitch into a smile as he said, "If I may, is it possible the shinigami have a power similar to a hollow? Or perhaps a hollow have a power similar to a shinigami?"

I thought I heard Kurai growl as Soi Fon said, "I'll look into that but for now Aizen patrol southern Rukongai Urahara take the north," she flash stepped away as I headed north Kurai suddenly let out a ear rippling growl _What is it?! _I shouted a bit alarmed.

**Nothing…please just promise me you'll stay away from Aizen…** he said his voice sounded as if it was holding back anger.

_Honestly I'm a bit surprised by your sudden hatred toward Aizen!_ I protested.

_**Please just trust us Kurenai…we have good reason!**_ Awai said, I sighed what's with everyone today?! Although I did find it a bit suspicious…first Gin was thirty minutes later then the rest of us…then Gin had his sword out in Aizen's office, there was blood on it, and Soi Fon told me she sent half the mobile corps out before the meeting, they were all killed by sword, was it possible?

_What do you guys know about Gin?_ I asked them.

_**Other then the fact he reminds you of-**_ I cut Awai off.

_I SWEAR I'LL THROUGH YOU INTO HUECO MUNDO IF YOU SPEAK THAT NAME! _I ignored them for the rest of the time…as Kurai went into wolf form and let me ride him I noticed nothing suspicious about the Rukongai…I went around a second time and found a group of thousands of villagers in the middle of area 80 of the Rukongai all dead by a hollow attack…I suddenly had a flash back of the mysterious events 70 years ago…it was kind of like this …people mysteriously killed by hollows…

_Remember that?_ I asked them.

_**Yes…we remember…**_Awai's voice sounded almost hostile…

**You went with Kensei to investigate…**Kurai reminded me, I was suddenly aware of another presence I jolted around as Kurai growled…ripple in the sky suddenly opened as a Menos Grande and four hollows stepped out! I was planning on making a Kido barrier to keep the villagers safe but apparently they weren't gonna wait! A red orb started gathering reishi in the Menos's mouth, a cero!

As I yelled, "Ookami-no-sono-kurai Higyou-no-ato-tsuki-zetsumei!" as five reishi crescents shot out from the dagger it sliced three of the four hollows as they were destroyed the cero was headed right toward me I jumped up and dodged it as I used the crystal orb to absorb the attack right before it blew into a forest, I commanded the other reishi crescents to make a shield protecting myself as I released the cero from the orb, killing the remainder but five more hollows came! GEEZ! I didn't realize there was a second Menos from the first batch! A cero was heading my way and I didn't have enough time! Well this was a lame way to die!

_HAHAHA! FINALLY!_ a voice in my mind suddenly shouted, as I felt myself lose control of my body it started attacking! Wh-what was I doing?! _Your fighting! Well I'm fighting!_ The voice shouted.

_WHO ARE YOU!?_ I shouted at myself.

**Kurenai! FIGHT IT!** Kurai's voice told me the strain in his voice was noticeable.

_Fight what?!_

_**THE HOLLOW! It's controlling you!**_ What hollow?!

_YOU MEAN ME?!_ the voice shouted again, as my body continued to fight the hollows I noticed I wasn't looking through my own eyes! I was looking through someone else's!

_Finally figure that out did you?_ the voice said again.

_Are you on my side?! _I shouted at it.

_Let's just say it'd be a problem for me if you died!_ it shouted.

**FIGHT IT Kurenai!** Kurai shouted again, I tried to move my arm when I was suddenly thrust into a pool of water I saw my reflection! A hollow mask covered my face! A flashing image of that night came as I began fighting for control at the same time fighting for my life against the Hollows! I began getting desperate and decided just to let it fight it wasn't doing anything wrong!

_THOSE ANNOYING ZANPAKU-TO'S OF YOURS HAVE HELD ME BACK TO LONG! I WANT TO FIGHHHHHHHHHHHHHT_

**DAMMIT Kurenai! FIGHT IT! **Kurai yelled again.

_Why?! It's not like-_

I began when Awai yelled, _**IT WILL TAKE CONTROL OF YOU! FIGHT IT!**_ well I wasn't ready to be controlled for the rest of my life so I decided to follow there orders I fought for control.

As the voice yelled, _You win for now…but I'll be back! And when I am it will be me who gains control!_ it shouted as the mask came off only one Menos was left I personally felt utterly exhausted, as I sliced up the last Menos a cero was coming right at me when someone blocked it, Aizen? He held back the cero with just his sword!

"Th-Thanks…" I said out of breath, I didn't see why Kurai and Awai told me not to trust Aizen! For crying out loud he just saved my life! But I had other problems…that hollow mask! That's when I remembered that dream…the hollow mask! Shinji and the others all had them…Aizen helped me up when he noticed the dead villagers.

"Well I guess we know how they died…" he said most likely referring to the Menos…

"Yeah…" I muttered as Soi Fon and the undead half of the mobile corps showed up.

"Captain's Aizen and Urahara please report!" one of the mobile corps people asked as I told them my side of the story, not including the part where I turn into a hollow, Aizen said he found a familiar group of dead bodies in the southern Rukongai…that's when I noticed my leg was bleeding I hid it underneath my hakama pants.

"You should get that leg healed…" Aizen pointed out, -_- I used the crystal orb and healed it.

"There…" I muttered… That night as I was laying in bed I decided to ask them…

_So…what was that?_ I asked, they didn't answer which annoyed me so I retorted to there silence, _Fine! Don't tell me! Next time I'll just let it control me and see where that get's me! _They both let out sighs.

Then Awai said, _**It's time you learned the truth about what happened that night…**_

_SO YOU GUYS DID KNOW! _I shouted.

**Yes…we knew…** Kurai began, **And we've been lying to you about it for some time…but it was only to protect you…**geez they sound like some overprotective parents…

_**It's time you learned the truth…**_


	6. Chapter 6

**Theme song: Fall to pieces By: Avril Lavigne ****.com/watch?v=BGh0CcbVoPQ**

"**You were the last one and your hollowfication wasn't complete you still had a chance…so Shinji erased your memory to keep you from coming after them, and Kisuke sealed the hollow…he left the rest of it to us but he knew we wouldn't be able to hold the hollow off forever so he didn't erase our memories…" Kurai told me.**

"**Shinji and the others were banned to the world of the living and Aizen framed Kisuke for the hollowfication incident…" Awai finished.**

"**What'd he do with the Hogyoku?" I asked, when I saw Awai and Kurai share a glance as I moaned and yelled, "Are you seriously keeping MORE secrets from me!?" they were silent as I rolled my eyes and moved onto the next question, "Why hasn't Aizen tried to kill me?" I asked them next playing with a strand of my hair.**

"**He had no reason to kill you…if he killed you he'd have to cover up another death and for no reason, but now he does have a reason…" Awai said, it made sense I guess…**

"**Do you know where Kisuke and the Vizards are now?" I asked them.**

"**We have an idea where Kisuke is, as for the Vizards…" Kurai began.**

"**We have no clue…and to be honest…some of them may not have survived the hollowfication…" Awai said sympathetically but sympathy was the last thing I wanted right now!**

"**GOD! SO YOU DECIDED NOW TO DROP THAT BOMB! OH! WELL THANKS! THAT HELPS A LOT!" I shouted I just wanted to beat the crap out of something right now…I didn't know what to do now…**

"**What do I do?" I asked them through clenched teeth, they sighed again.**

"**From now…it's your choice…" Kurai said.**

"**I DON'T WANT CHOICES I WANT MY LIFE BACK! I WANT **_**THEM**_** BACK! I WANT…!" I shouted. As I collapsed on my knees, "I-I-I…I just want…" I wanted to burst into tears, I wanted his arms wrapped around me…I wanted to hear his voice whisper in my ear that everything would be okay…**

"**What do I do…?" I asked in a whimper, Awai nuzzled my cheek.**

"**What do you want to do?" Kurai asked I sat up on the bed regaining myself.**

"**A battle you can't win…that's what it feels like…no matter how much you cry, pray, wish, beg, shout, scream…the worlds not going to change…neither is the past…" I sighed as I looked into Kurai's vibrant silver eyes and stroked Awai's shaggy white fur, "I can't make Toshiro and Ukitake go through what I did…but I want to see Shin- **_**Him**_** again…I need to find Kisuke…and I want revenge on Aizen…" I told Kurai and Awai. **

"**So what are you going to do about it?" Kurai asked…well I needed to know…**

"**My inner hollow…how do I control it?" I asked them, they looked at me like I was insane, "Well I'm going to need to know!" I protesting proving my point, as Awai said a bit unsure.**

"**Well…there's only one person who we can think of who would know how to do that…" she paused as Kurai finished, "Your brother…Kisuke…" I sighed…of course it **_**had**_** to be him! Damn…**

"**Oh well…" I sighed…I'd just have to use other means…but I was going to hurt Ukitake and Toshiro…badly…I was selfish…stupid… but I wanted to do this…I wondered how many other people I'd hurt in the process, there was absolutely no person in the world I'd hate more than myself once I did this…**

"**I'm going to need your help…" I told them. **

"**Please don't be rash!" Awai begged.**

"**I'm gonna need to go to the world of the living…" I told him.**

"**That! Would be along the lines of rash!" Kurai shouted.**

"**I don't care anymore…I'm going to be rash…I'm gonna be half dead by the time I finish…but I don't care…not anymore…" I told them…**

The next day went on pretty normally…I didn't really care much anymore and it felt great not to care! After lunch I was called to a captains meeting…

"Yesterday Captain's Aizen and Urahara investigated and found out about the Menos but there's still the mystery about the shinigami that were killed by sword," The head captain stated when Soi Fon stepped forward and said, "Yesterday Captain Aizen made an interesting proposal," I hid a smile…perfect…

"The suggestion of Vizards and Arrancars," Kurotsuchi said as he stepped forward, "A Vizard is a Shinigami that has acquired the powers of a hollow, an Arrancar is a hollow that has removed it's mask thus gaining shinigami like powers, these are both interesting suggestions both of these acts are illegal within the soul society so it's highly unlikely…"

As I stepped forward and asked emotionlessly "Yesterday, the head Captain said that this was most likely the work of rouge shinigami is it possible these rouge shinigami some how turned into Vizards?" I saw the head captains eyes narrow as I said the word Vizard, the meeting was adjourned after the head captain said that they would look into it…as I was leaving someone caught my arm, I spun around using Yoruichi's flash step with a turn move.

"Ukitake?" I asked emotionlessly, "Yes, Kurenai, would you join me for tea?" he asked it didn't seem unusual but I had a feeling he knew…but of course he couldn't approach me with it directly so he would try something like this…

"I'd be delighted…" I said not betraying a bit of emotion, as I followed him, as we sat down.

"Kurenai…what are you trying to do?" he asked I blinked and let my self show a bit of ignorance.

"What do you mean?" I asked, he sighed as he looked down and shook his head.

"When you woke up from that coma…do you remember anything from that night?" he asked trying not to push it too much, I sighed and looked away.

"I've told you this before…I don't remember anything…as much as I wish I did…" I muttered, he sighed again and said, "When you woke up, and they were gone…I know it must've been hard…Shinji and you were close…Hiyori and-"

I jolted up and yelled, "Did you invite me just to remind me that my life sucks?!" I shouted it letting anger sink threw my words, as I stormed out and left I remembered that I had to play ignorant…Aizen probably suspects something too if Ukitake was smart enough to pick up on that Aizen probably thinks something of it too but that's exactly what I want…

**I can't believe after everything I've told you your really doing this! **Kurai scolded I smirked…

_Well believe it!_


	7. Chapter 7

**Theme song: Lying from you By: Linkin park ****.com/watch?v=rnj1ir_mK4I**

"ANOTHER ATTACK?!" I shouted in surprise, as the hell butterfly landed on my finger.

"Yes apparently this one occurred in the Seireitei!" Toshiro informed me as we flash stepped to first division HQ, it was becoming a regular…

"In the Seireitei!?" I shouted, this was becoming almost insane…what was Aizen planning?

_**I don't know but I think he has more in mind then just you…**_ Awai said I had to agree with her, he wouldn't go through this much trouble just for one person…last time he got rid of six captains the Kido captain and four assistant captains! He can't be planning something that big again!

_Could he?_

**I don't know…Aizen's smart and last time he had the entire Seireitei wrapped around his finger…** Kurai warned, I began wondering…was I playing right into Aizen's hand? Or was he playing into mine? The question now was…who controlled the chess board? The last few times I spoke to Aizen I'd be trying to figure out the truth…now I was trying to make my own…and then there was Gin and Tosen…

"Captains! As you know there has been another attack but this time it's within the Seireitei! Ten Shinigami were found hanging from the Sokyoku!" well…a hollow's not smart enough for that…

"There's a traitor within the Seireitei…" The head captain stated I saw his eyes flicker to mine if just for an instant…

_I'll be a prime suspect, Kisuke was the one who was supposed to be behind it last time…so it would be natural to blame his little sister…_ I said.

**That's true…**

"The frustrating part is we have no proof of who's behind this," the general said, _no proof_…the way he said it sounded like he had a suspicion but no real proof…

"A Vizard or an Arrancar is our main suspicion but to our knowledge there is no such thing within the Seireitei…" the general continued…to _his_ knowledge…

_**I don't think anyone other then Aizen and possibly Gin and Tosen know about your inner hollow…**_ Awai reassured me.

"For safety precautions all Shinigami are forbidden to enter the world of the living, that finishes our meeting please keep in mind that you can trust _no one_…" he said I avoided his gaze as I saw Aizen crack a smile…

**That head captain seems a bit paranoid…but his last warning will have everyone on there toes…** Kurai told me but it sounded more like a warning to me the way he said it. It was around eleven at night and I was just finishing some last minute paper work…

"You know you can leave Toshiro…" I told the snowy haired boy who had insisted on finish his paper work…

"I know…" he said as my stomach grumbled loudly, he heard this and offered, "I can make you something to eat if you want…"

I nodded and said, "Thank you, where would I be without you and your fabulous cooking skills?" I ask dramatically.

He smirked and said, "Starving in a ditch some where…" as I laughed it almost hurt knowing what I was about to…

**What exactly is it? You haven't even told us yet…**Kurai pointed out as I told him.

_You'll see…_ Toshiro came back in as I ate he watched me with interest I noticed this and arched an eyebrow.

I asked him, "Why are you staring at me like that?" he turned away and then looked back at me his eyes met mine as he said, "I-I-I just feel like…I'm about to lose you…which is stupid because you were never really mine to lose…" right then I wanted to tell him everything…I couldn't bare to hurt him…

But I played ignorant as I said, "Well in a way everyone's at risk with this Vizard/Arrancar…"

He sighed and walked to the door as he said, "That's not what I mean…but…good night captain…"

Damn! DAMN! MOVE! MOVE! I commanded my body but it continued to deny my wishes as the Vasto Lord advanced closer…no! NO!

"Pugh-The-Tic!" it mimicked as sweat ran in beads down my face…my blood soaked body was at its limits…

_You ARE pathetic!_ the voice was back!

"DAMN IT! GO AWAY! I DON'T NEED YOUR HELP!" I shouted at my inner hollow.

_ARE YOU KIDING ME!?!? You'd be dead if it weren't for me!_ the hollow taunted I wanted to ignore it and not believe it…but it was the truth! I gave in as the red haze overwhelmed me with a blood thirst!

I suddenly heard Soi Fon's voice as well as the nearly silent sounds of the mobile corps! WAIT! She can't see me like this! NOT YET! I started fighting back for control as the hollow sensed it was in danger and left…I finished the Vasto Lord and ran before Soi Fon was able to find me…I was angry, mad, furious, just plain pissed off…and maybe even a little sad…but on top of it all I was just…I didn't know…it was that feeling where everything just pisses you off! The feeling where you can't think strait and just want to hit something! The feeling where everything is mixed up and-!

**Your confused…**Kurai said it so bluntly I just got more pissed! While I ignored Awai's constant nagging…

_**YOU NEED TO BE MORE CAREFUL KURENAI!!! IF YOUR NOT YOU MIGHT JUST END UP IN THE MAGGOTS NEST!!! **_Awai shouted outraged…I knew she was angry but this was how it had to be.

_Aizen wouldn't allow that, it might mess up his plan…_I told her sincerely but sarcastically with as much rage as I could manage.

**That maybe true but you ****do**** need to be more careful Kurenai!** Kurai said he was more calm about it then Awai but he sounded like he was holding back a lot of anger…they would just have to get used to it thought…

_**I'm not going to be the zanpaku-to of a dead person!**_ Awai growled, as she continued nagging me as I caved and threw my arms up into the air.

_FINE! I'll be more careful!! Happy? _I shouted, as I threw a dagger at the wall it lodged it's self into the wall…I just wanted to fight! I tracked down Kenpachi not caring that it was two am…

"WAKE UP DAMN IT!" I shouted loudly in his ear, he jolted up wildly swinging his sword…he wasn't that hard to find he was the only 6'6 guy with a 3'6 pink haired girl sleeping on his lap…


	8. Chapter 8

**Theme song: Fighting By: Yellowcard ****.com/watch?v=aIhk4GiNF2A**

"Who the hell-!?" he shouted then he spotted me with my Zanpaku-to's out and both in Shikai form.

"Can't this wait till morning?!" he grumbled, I made a pft sound and sliced down five trees with a small movement of my finger as I said bluntly.

"No…and did I just hear the captain of eleventh division turn down a fight?" I pointed out, I sneered as his face turned from rage to anger to laziness to excitement…

"Uh! I hate it when you get like this…you make it impossible to say no!" he grumbled standing up, I smirked this is what I needed a nice bloody battle! And Kenpachi is the first person I go to when I feel like this!

"Ready yet?" I continued to taunted as he smiled smugly.

"I'm just waitin' for you to shudup!" He said.

It was about 5 am now and we'd destroyed almost every thing within a ten mile radius…Kenpachi looked like the living dead but I probably did too…he wore a huge grin on his face as he laughed. I felt a smug smile appear on my own face! Oddly enough I felt great being covered in blood head to toe…being reckless and not giving a shit!

"URAHARA! ZARAKI!!!" A familiar party pooper voice shouted we both turned our heads…old man Yama with all the other captains and lieutenants…

"Stand down…" the general said his voice held that authority that forced you to do what he wanted…I looked around at the mess we'd made the thought of waking anyone up hadn't really come to mind…the captains and lieutenants were all staring down at us, the only ones who weren't there were Kenpachi, Toshiro, Yachiru and myself… 'We' meaning Kenpachi and myself spent the next day repairing the damage using our own reishi Kenpachi had diluted himself into thinking it was a contest and had taken his eye patch off so we were pretty much finished…once we were done I had planned to go and take a nap when a bumped into the scared chest of Kenpachi.

"What?" I groaned as I stood back so I could meet his gaze…

His grip on my arm tightened as he said, "Your reishi…it's changed color…and it's intensity it's stronger…" he actually noticed that? Even the old man hadn't noticed that!

"And?" I said sarcastically pulling out of his grip playing it ignorant.

"AND! It means you've been holding back on me!" he stated same old Kenpachi I guess…I felt myself sigh in relief though.

"Well…now you'll never know!" I said a bit tauntingly as I shadow stepped away…and walked into fourth division to borrow some bandages…once I finished I went to the office to finish some paper work, that's when Toshiro's words came back: _I just feel like I'm about to lose you…_I bit my tongue…right then Kiyone and Sentaro burst into the office as Sentaro screamed at the top of his lungs.

"CAPTAIN UKITAKE REQUESTS AND AUDIENCE WITH CAPTAIN-!" he was about to go on when I threw a knife that just barely missed his head.

"No yelling in the office…" I growled as Kiyone whispered.

"See! I told you! I was supposed to tell her! Now you've just made her mad!" they began arguing as I rolled my eyes and went to thirteenth division wondering what he wanted…I walked in he was sitting calmly at his desk drinking tea…he smiled.

"I'm glad you're here Kurenai!" he chimed, I replied with a grunt not moving from where I was standing…

"Please have a seat," he said gesturing toward a seat I sat…

"Ukitake please just cut the crap and tell me why I'm here…" I said bluntly, he sighed as he set down his tea.

"Kurenai I believe you already know _why_ your brother was exiled?" he asked, I shrugged.

"Central 46 blamed him for some crap and he was exiled right?" I said dismissively.

"He was exiled under the accusation of illegal experiments involving Vizards," Ukitake said now serious. "I'm not supposed to be telling you this but I think you have a right to know…" I shrugged again…I did know…I knew a lot more then people thought I did…

"Your point is that I'm the prime suspect of this and I should stop causing so much trouble…" I said putting it into simpler words he looked at me with a bit of a shocked expression but it soon softened and he nodded.

"Exactly…" he said, I sighed.

"What if I want to cause trouble…?" I muttered, his frown deepened making him seem years older.

"Why would you want to do that?" he asked, I got up, and shrugged.

"Just a question…" I left…I shouldn't of said that but I wanted to…maybe then they wouldn't be so surprised in the end…

**Do you really want to do this?** Kurai asked once I got back to tenth division.

_Nope…_ I said casually.

_**But your still doing it…**_ Awai growled.

_Yup…_ I said, _**WHY?!**_ they both shouted…I didn't answer that question…


	9. Chapter 9

**Theme song: Noots By: Sum 41 ****.com/watch?v=iee_qTmh3WI**

I knew I had no choice but to do this…betray the soul society…trust me the choice had nearly driven me insane! It would be a lot easier if I knew what Aizen was planning then I could find out when to…

**Your over thinking things…** Kurai said bluntly,

_Well I don't see you trying to be helpful! _

_**She's got a point there…**_

**SHUT UP! **They began fighting again as I went to sleep I was awakened the next day with a loud alert,

*ALL CAPTAIN'S AND LIEUTENANTS REPORT IMMEDIATELY TO FIRST DIVISION'S HQ!* I jolted up unthinkingly and got dressed within a minute I was in the HQ within five minutes so was everyone else except for seventh division's captain…and a new addition was added to the crowd…the Kido commander's lieutenant…a twisted feeling began in my stomach…

"Captain's and Lieutenants last night something horrible happened! Our Kido commander and seventh division's captain were both killed!" I gasped in horror along with others…

"They were significantly killed by a shinigami…" he went on,

"H-How?" I muttered, was Aizen really that strong?! Did I have any hope of beating him?! I didn't really know seventh division's captain someone under the name of Okeira Minazuki her lieutenant was Sajin Komamura…

"Lieutenant Komamura will be taking her place as for the Kido commander we know not…" the general continued…

**Aizen…**Kurai growled under his breath,

_So he is after more then just me…_I said,

_**I don't know Kurenai but don't underestimate him…**_I never did…I stole a glance at Aizen I couldn't tell under his glasses but I felt that he was looking at me too…

"Fifth division's captain has already volunteered to permanently investigate in this matter until it is solved if you have any information about this matter please contacted him!" Yamamoto finished…

**THAT LYING LITTLE BAST-! **Kurai began when Awai stopped him,

_**Shut up! He wont attack any of the captains from now on it'd be too risky…**_

**It doesn't change the fact that he did! **Kurai argued…why did he care so much? He seemed to want revenge on Aizen more then I did…Kurai went into wolf form and ran away.

_Why the-?!_ I began.

When Awai sighed and said, _**Just let him be for now…he's a bit sensitive on the subject of Aizen…**_

This just encouraged my curiosity, _Why?_ I asked as Awai too turned went into wolf form…

_**It's a bit of a long story…**_she said as we walked back to Tenth division's office.

She sat down on the couch as she said, "I'm about to tell you the story of your Zanpaku-to…you've probably realized we're not like other Zanpaku-to there are two of us in this Zanpaku-to our family of wolves take turns inhabiting this zanpaku-to when the wielder of this Zanpaku-to dies…we do too…and a new generation of wolves inhabit it…our parents inhabited this zanpaku-to before us…but there time was cut short when there wielder was killed by a man under the name of Sosuke Aizen…"

I gasped, "So that's why Kurai hate's him so much…"

Awai nodded…I sighed… "I'm going to talk to Aizen!" I declared.

Awai jolted up guarding the door as she growled and yelled, "YOUR WHAT?!" I rolled my eyes.

"I'll just act like I'm there to talk about the murders, it wont look suspicious at all!" I persisted, she didn't budge…

"Aw! Common Awai! It's not like he'd attack me in front of everyone!"

She snarled, as she said, "At least wait for Kurai to get back!" I sighed and said, "Fine!" we sat there waiting for what seemed like hours when Kurai finally came back!

"TOOK LONG ENOUGH!" I shouted, "What?" he asked innocently, Awai explained as he growled I managed to persist him in the end as I walked down to fifth division I hear Gin and Tosen's voices…

"Good job Gin I expected nothing less from you…the general suspected nothing…" Aizen praised Gin, "Getting rid of the kido commander proved difficult…but you managed Tosen I'm pleased…" he went on, "Killing those captains was hard enough we'll wait for five days…" Aizen said, "Each night we'll send one of _them_ to kill a different shinigami from a different squad…the fifth night will be when we strike…_her_…" he said calmly.

"Ya really are devious Aizen-sama…" Gin said like a little child admiring his hero…it sickened me…

"Tosen I assume…?" Aizen said.

"Of course…" Tosen replied…who was 'one of them' and what did Aizen assume?! I assumed _her_ was me…

_**You know what your going to do, the challenge now…**_ Awai began.

**Is doing it…** Kurai finished…

**MEANWHILE**

"_**It's possible Kisuke made her a Vizard and sealed it…" **_

"_**If that's the case then it's obvious she's the one who's been doing this…" **_

"_**True…" **_

"_**But he have no proof…" **_

"_**He's right we'll need proof before we can apprehend her," **_

"_**If it's revealed that she is a Vizard she will be banned from the soul society…and banished to world of the living…" **_

"_**But it's possible then for her to find her brother or the other Vizards she's dangerous and putting a weapon like her in there hands isn't a wise idea…" **_

"_**That's true as well," **_

"_**Till then,"**_

I knew what to do now…so all that was left was saying good-bye and actually doing it…that night I was awake at one am writing a letter…a goodbye letter to be precise…I wrote it over and over but couldn't seem to get it quite right…and I was doing this…why? I had no clue…the next day the third seat of first division was killed…by a hollow…for the next few day's I tried to distance myself from everyone as much as possible…it's easier said then done…considering the fact that Toshiro was my lieutenant…all day while we were doing paper work he wouldn't stop staring at me when I finally snapped and shouted, "WHAT ARE YOU STARING AT?!"

He was shocked for a second then shook his head and said, "Nothing…" he went back to doing his paper work.

"Go…" I said not looking up from my paper work.

"What?" he asked.

"Go! Do something fun I'll finish the paper work…" I said, this time he didn't protest and just left…as I finished my paper work I left the office…two more days…the words that I would leave behind slowly came in place as the nights progressed…there was one night where I even doubted what to do…but I knew my path…and tonight…I would take it without looking back…Good-bye~


	10. Chapter 10

**Theme song: In the end By: Linkin Park ****.com/watch?v=z8ePXFH3CSA&feature=fvw**

**Are you sure you want to do this?** Kurai asked

_**After tonight…there's no turning back…**_ Awai warned,

_Once they found out I was a Vizard they'd shun me and banish me either way…this way's less painful…_I told them,

**Are you ready? **

…_Yes…I am…_I tied the letter and left it some where only Toshiro would find it…betrayal…the word suddenly made sense to me…screams erupted from first division…five people from each division…I shadow stepped to captains HQ and saw someone I didn't expect…Aizen!? He was supposed to be…no…Gin and Tosen must be doing it…Aizen had a smug smile on his face,

"I congratulate you…for coming this far…" he said calmly, I glared,

"You were never surprised…not for one second…you knew all of this would happen…" I said struggling not to let any emotion leek through…

"Yes…that is true…" he said now advancing toward me,

"Tell me! Who are you killing and what did you really do that night?!" I shouted, his smug look grew,

"Can't you tell…the people I'm _killing _are already dead…there's only one person from your division who I haven't killed yet…" he said my eyes widened…no…it can't be!

"Yes…" Aizen whispered tauntingly, suddenly it was as if glass was shattering I blinked as I reopened my eyes…there lay Toshiro…was he dead?!

"No…not yet…" Gin's voice said I jolted around…

"Your so naïve…just like that oaf of a Captain…Shinji Hirako…" Aizen patronized me, I grit my teeth,

"What are you trying to do Aizen!?" I shouted losing my composure,

"I can't tell you that at the moment…but you have something that I need…" he said, I noticed Tosen was now here as well, the screams from the other divisions continued,

"S-S-Something you need?" I stuttered, what could I possibly have that he wanted!?

"So ignorant…" Aizen continued, right then I saw something I hadn't before!

"NO!" I shouted as I transformed into a hollow and managed to stop him just in time before he stabbed Toshiro…this isn't…how it was supposed to be! I mentally shouted I took Toshiro and used shadow step, escaping I took him back to Tenth division when a blood thirst overwhelmed me! …for Aizen's! I could feel an animal instinct take over as I attacked blindly not caring who I hurt or what happened…red…everything blacked out…and all I wanted was to kill…

**NO ONE'S POV.**

A hollow went on a rampage through the soul society what was it?! It held more strength then a normal hollow! When the captains of the Gotei 13 surrounded the demon and pinned it to the ground…they realized…it was no ordinary hollow…the demon morphed into the shape of a human…a human girl…her long black silky hair covered in blood her eyes still held a lusting for blood gasps of shock…unbelieving what there eyes saw…no longer was it Kurenai Urahara Captain of tenth division shinigami of the Seireitei…it was something else, she was now Tsukira Urahara…the traitor Vizard…a monster in there eyes…a demon, an illegal presence…

**FIVE DAY'S LATER**

"Kurenai Urahara ex-Captain of tenth division you have been accused of murder and the illegal act of awakening hollow powers! Do you object?" mixed emotions stirred through her,

"N-No! I didn't know I was a vizard and I didn't-!"

"SILENCE!"

"Upon admitting you are a vizard you have claimed the responsibility of a murderer!" panic and anger washed over her face,

"No I didn't-!"

"KURENAI URAHARA EX-CAPTAIN OF TENTH DIVISION WILL BE EXECUTED!" these words sunk into the girls mind anger arose,

"NO!" she shouted again,

"IT WASN'T ME I DIDN'T DO IT! IT WAS AIZEN!" they were all quiet for a second…

"You have admitted to being a vizard that is all the proof we need! You will be executed in one months time!" with that her fate was decided…The Soul Society was in an uproar no one knew what to make of this…but few believed she had been the murderer…she mysteriously disappeared four days before her execution no one knew how but she's been assumed dead…

**PROLOGUE**

**Theme song: Waiting for the world to fall By: Jars of clay **

_Among the few that still didn't believe she was a murderer there was Toshiro, Ukitake, Rangiku, Kenpachi, Yachiru, Renji, Rukia, and a few others…but to be honest they didn't know what to make of this…a year passed she was assumed dead…Toshiro was now the captain of tenth division and Rangiku the lieutenant, it was on the exact same day she disappeared he found that letter…it had been a long week of paper work and dealing with Matsumoto's idiocy…as he relaxed back in his chair he realized it had now been exactly a year since she left…_

_As he finished his paper work he noticed a piece of paper he hadn't ever noticed before…it was tied elegantly with a red ribbon, inscribed in kanji was the name: Kurenai Urahara, written on the edge of the ribbon he opened it carefully not wanting to rip it, reading over the contents he was absolutely sure she was not to blame…he frowned reading the end of it that was a stupid request …thinking that they could all just forget her so easily…that's when he remembered when she told him about what happened those years ago…she was forgotten…by her friends and her brother…Toshiro had made up his mind…he would wait…he told her that he would wait for her and he would. Until the day she came back he would be waiting… thinking over it he read the letter over and over some how he felt closer to her when he read it. To him the letter was a promise…a promise to return…Maybe he was just being stupid but he knew she'd return one day…she may not love him but he would always love her and he'd always be waiting for her to see that!_

_Toshiro, Ukitake, and who ever else may happen to find this~_

_I may never be coming back. Heh, if this were not such a serious matter I'd probably be laughing at such a serious beginning but unfortunately this is a serious matter…that I do have to face…please let this be the truth, what is the truth you may ask? Well let me explain I cannot tell you the full truth of my disappearance but I will tell you this: If there was an alternative I would've taken it but there is not. I've considered over and over but either way I would end up hurting you. You must hate me by now I would understand if you do…I wish that everything could be back to the way things were but they cannot, I've made up my decision now that I know the truth I cannot simply act as if I don't this is nothing personal it's simply a matter of the way things are, as much as I wish I could change them a thing I've come to learn in time is that as much as you pray, wish, beg, shout, cry, scream…the world wont change…neither will the past…so why regret what you can't change. By the time you read this I guarantee you it will be too late, I'm beginning to hate my self for this I sound like some person writing a suicide note. You may never forgive me and in a way…That's exactly what I want…there will never be a day where I don't regret all of this but I can't take back what has already happened…the time I've spent with you Toshiro was like a dream but it was all simply an illusion clouding me from reality. Ukitake, thank you you've always been there for me and even if I don't show it…I do care and I will miss you…tell Kenpachi he'll have to find a new sparing partner and tell Renji that if I ever see him again I'll be expecting that five dollars he owes me~ _

_I will now ask of you to please forgive me and if possible…forget me…_

Kurenai Urahara~


End file.
